Brass Balls!

Posted On June 4, 2002

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It must be ass kicking day or something!
A couple of weeks ago… The day I listed all of the domain names I own, actually, I noticed that some of my domains were not resolving. (some still aren’t) I started doing some investigating, and I found out that had been turned loose into the domain name pool. I was like… man, they could have at least given me a heads up that it was expiring or something. So I quickly bought that domain again, Then I remembered that I had trouble with that domain name about a month or so earlier, and I had just renewed it on April 5th of 2002.
So tonight I called to put the smack down, and tell them how much they suck. I had to use them because that’s who Adam used in the first place, and Tracy wanted her site up ASAP so I couldn’t wait for it to be turned loose. I put the $19.95 down and unwillingly renewed it for another year. My point is… is teh suxs!! I had to call them 4 times just to get this resolved. The first call was going ok, but I wasn’t really prepared. I didn’t have my registration number in front of me. So I told the guy I would call back. Two minutes later I called again, and someone said I had to call another number for tech support. He at least gave me a toll free number that doesn’t seem to be listed on their site. So I called that number (3rd call) and started explaining to this guy (Will, I think) what the problem was, and he rudely put me on hold (I was mid sentence, and he said “Can you hold on for a second?). So I’m sitting there and all of a sudden I start to get a ringing tone, and some other dude answers. He’s like “Hello?” and I’m like… “Hello?” … and then I go “Who is this?” and he said he was support for something. I thought he said Adobe, and I was like… This is Adobe tech support? and he said i don’t think you use “whatever he was support for” and I was like… I was holding for tech support and now I’m talking to you. I have no idea why. Are you affiliated with or at all? And he said no. Somehow we got connected, but fuck if I know how.
So I called the 800 number again (4th time) and I got connected with Ben. I explained what happened, and AGAIN I was cut off mid sentence and put on hold. I was like… Dude, I must be on mother fucking Spy TV or some shit! Good thing I have pants on. Then Ben came back on the line, and said he could see what I had explained to him… I could log on to admin through but whois said I wasn’t with them. Which, thankfully, I’m not. And that’s when I let poor old Ben have it. I told him why I didn’t register the domain name thorough them again. I explained why Lazerland no longer has a reseller account through them. I explained why the remaining 9873298723 domains that Adam registered through them will not be renewed. I told him how rude and incompetent I thought everyone at and are. I let the poor guy hear it all. So now that n199@ is crediting my card $19.95.
But let me tell you where the rage began… After work I was consulting Tanja about her site and her net connection in her new office. And I was consulting Ralf about his proposed satellite purchase. And Andre was on the phone with someone, and he interrupted me and asked me if I could ride to Macarena and help them with their email. Supposedly, all they wanted to do was email 700 people but they didn’t want all of the email addresses to show. I’m like… fuckit. Address book > select all> drag to Bcc:> I ride to Spec’s. It wasn’t that simple.
I reluctantly rode the 3 blocks IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION of my home, and found the people I was looking for. It turns out that they’re using some windows program called Goldmine or something. I dunno, but I had never heard of it. let alone used it. Andre said they were using Outlook. What they wanted to do was export their 8923748902734832 email address from Goldmine, and import them into Outlook because they couldn’t get Goldmine to send email. I couldn’t help them with exporting the addresses, but I was able to get Goldmine to send email. They had the wrong SMTP settings.
So I rode on to Spec’s, and I was doing my usual Tuesday shopping. I had 2 CDs in my hands, and I was looking for a 3rd. They made an announcement about backpacks/bags needing to be left upfront. I ignored it. A few seconds later this dude came up to me and said that I had to take my bag upfront. I handed him my CDs and started to walk out. He asked me what my problem was, and I said “If you don’t trust me with my bag, then I’m for sure not going to trust YOU with it.” and I continued walking out again. The guy got in front of me, and was like “Who do you think you are?” That set me off! Glen Gary Glen Ross style! I said: Who am I? Have you seen me here before? He aid “Yeah, of course.” I continued: I’m the guy that’s in here at least twice a week, spending $100 or more almost every time! The guy was looking at me like I was full of shit. I said, “You see this watch? You see this watch? That watch cost more than your car. I made $970,000 last year, how much you make? You see pal, that’s who I am and you’re nothing. ”
So I fucking left.
I always leave when they say I can’t have my bag in there… Or I can’t park my bike in there. Fuck them, I got the internet! (but I’ll be back in a couple of days… I always go back.)


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