Posted On July 30, 2001

Filed under Uncategorized

Comments Dropped 3 responses

The most fucked up thing is that, somehow, everything I do… Everything I think… Pretty much everything that makes me, me, is centered around her. I never realized that until I was blind sided by the reality of her never coming here.
Her not coming here makes it all feel pointless. It makes me feel worthless, or something. It’s totally fucked up for ME to feel this way, but it almost gives me a feeling like there is no point in being alive. Which is absurd, but it’s how I feel.
To me, the whole relationship was about experiencing things together. To say to me, “certain people have shown me a great time. shown me everything…” is quite crushing, knowing that I am not one of the “certain people”. It probably wouldn’t bother me much, except for the fact that I basically put my life on hold, in order to be the one to experience those things with her. And so that she could experience things with me.
And now… She’s already been there and done that. Me…? I’m just worthless.

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3 Responses to “”

  1. girlstar313

    hey..i dont really know you or whatever…and you may not even care to hear my advice..but speaking from experiance you should never put your life on hold for anyone…hopeing they will come around or whatever..cuz even if they say and promise that they will they might not…and that sucks major ass when that happens…..it pretty much fucking crushes ya..or at least it did to me…sounds like your in that place right now..and im sorry..its no fun….things will get better and you will think better about you or whatever…it will just take some time…
    and you not worthless…you may feel like it now or whatever….but you arent…i pinkie promise…

    • FANLESS

      I hear what you’re saying, and I pretty much agree. But it’s a lot easier said, than done.

      • girlstar313

        yah..most things are easier said then done…its like do what i say..not what i do…

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